Monday, 6 May 2019

Pareto upgrades


Pareto: You are pleased to mock my devotion to the Angora cat.

Om: No Dottore, I am following your indication of the error in looking at data through fanciful anthropological theory. From a 1000 year perspective I could hold that the cat is your totem, your spirit animal. You have an affinity for the animal that is substitutive, participative and therefore more than symbolic. Being the cat allows its powers to be manifest in you. Independent yet responsive but not immediately so, a cat seems to consider – do I care enough? Now of course all of that animal is sacred and its products are talismanic, like the milk of the sacred cow is so pure and powerful that its products may be shared by all without pollution. The jumper knit from the sacred cat yarn deflects, protects, enhances and is warm and lightweight.

Pareto: Unfortunately the vibrations from the Society for the Suppression of Vice have a moth-like power which diminishes the efficacy of the garment. A distressing fact, but what to do?

Om: So we must upgrade to a new derivation in line with present scientific knowledge. May I recommend a vial of heavy water?

Pareto: Only if blessed by Einstein.

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